Day 9 of birthday month... a confession

Today is Day 9 of my big birthday month celebration.. my gift to you... my confession. This is a really hard post to write!!!
I have worn myself thin with trying so hard to keep up with this blog, my homeschool blog, the penpal program etc.. oh yeah and being a MOMMA!!!! So I am taking the day off from the gift giveaway... come back tomorrow.. I will be giving away 2 gifts to make up for it :) I promise!!
I am going to sit in the sunshine today. I am going to read a book!!! I am going to snuggle my kids and kiss them so much they may not have skin left!! I am going to take a bubble bath and relax. Hopefully, with this little break from the computer etc.. I can have the strength to continue doing the things that I feel are so important.. which is love my friends, write, advocate for LDS homeschooling and help people connect. I love those things. I will continue to do those things.. but this momma is burnt out and needs a break!! :)
Like I said though.. come back tomorrow ( saturday) and I will be giving away 2 Amazing presents.. because I love my friends :)
With Love, JL

A Dream I Had Last Night......

I have always had very vivid dreams. Sometimes its a blessing, sometimes its a curse.
There are three dreams I remember very clearly. All three have really helped me in my life.
I will start with the dream I had last night. It was "inspired" by two things, one, my oldest Dylan has been giving us some trouble. He is almost 9 ( I cant believe I just wrote that!) and has been stretching his wings for independance. Which translates into throwing fits, talking back, you get the idea. The second thing that inspired the dream was my friend Laura texting me. She has a son who is the same age as Dylan. Her text was simple. " we have tweens." It hit me with full force!! Maybe that's why Dylan is acting like this. Maybe its not because Im a horrific momma. Maybe he is just entering the "tween" phase and truly trying to find who he is, what his limits are etc.
So, after another night last night of back talking, and praying, Heavenly Father what the heck do I do with this boy???? I had a dream......... ( note: my dreams can be wierd, but stick with me here)
We were in a parking lot at a place like walmart.... It was a big parking lot. There were cars parked there and I came out of the store and there was Dylan.... rollerblading ( remember they are wierd, but stick with me). He was going really fast, and he was really good, but when I called for him to come to me, he ignored me and rollerbladed farther away. There were cars driving around, I was frightened that he was going to get hurt!! I began to run, and as he went faster and faster around the parking lot, I began to get really frightened. I started screaming his name and running as fast as I could , I felt so much frustration and fear, I knew he was going to get hurt! Soon, a worker from the store came out and started yelling at Dylan to stop also... Dylan ignored him too. Sometimes Dylan was almost in my reach, and I missed him. Soon, I looked up and here comes my husband in our suv, zooming as fast as he could to try and catch Dylan. Now I was worried that Keith was going to cause an accident, but his face showed his fear that we weren't going to catch Dylan, and that he was going to get hurt.
This went on for way to long, I was seriously exhausted when I woke up. I finally did catch Dylan, and I wanted to wollop him!!!!! I was soooo angry that he would not listen to us and put himself in danger. When I woke up, I was shaking!
Now, here are my thoughts on this dream. Dylan is at an age, where if I don't work hard with him, try to stay "close" emotionally etc to him, he is going to get to the age where he can just rollerblade away, and I wont have the opportunity to teach him the rules of the "road". I realize that I have only a short time with my children before they become adults and fly away. It really strengthened my resolve to teach my children as much as I can, and to rely on Heavenly Father to show me the way. I made sure to give Dylan a BIG OLE HUG, when he woke up this morning. Dreams are wierd, for sure, but in this instance, I realized that Dylan is at an age where he should have more accountability ( he has been baptized) and that he needs to be taught continually , how to make right choices ( dont go rollerblading away from your momma in a busy parking lot mister!!!!)
I joined valuesparenting.com and signed up for their neat program for elementary aged children. They give such neat ideas on how to teach your children obedience, how to make decisions, and all of the other important values that we need to instill in our children. I still have alot of praying to do. But I know that Im not going to "lose" my son to his bad behavior. He just needs to be taught the tools to deal with his emotions, which are all over the place, and to be taught how to make better decisions and show respect. So I guess Im glad I had this wierd dream.
This post is kinda long.... I am going to leave the other two dreams for seperate posts, as they both have their story. Even if no one reads these, I will have them for posterity :)
Love, JL

Being a momma is never dull....

So my kids have a new "thing". They love to hide around the house and when their momma walks in the room.... they jump out and say BOO!!!!!!!
They get me every time!
Being a momma is never dull....

wierd days, excellent answers

For the past week, I have been feeling really blah. We have had such a busy month last month, with sooo much sickness, and now that im feeling better physically, my brain just kind of seems to be mush. so tired, so blah. Anyway, I have been feeling a bit down, and really just need to be in the sunshine. Thankfully it is supposed to be really nice out today, so im going to take the kids out to play this afternoon, which will help, but also, i read the neatest devotion today, it just seemed perfect for me today.
http://www.internetcafedevotions.com/2009/03/smooth-sailing.html

anyway, it was really good.
that is all for now. like i said, so blah! lol.